08 January 2009

Feeding the squirrels, or feeding ON them?


The subject just won't go away.

A new New York Times story reports once again on a resurgence in the British proposal to eradicate grey squirrels - the acknowledged nemesis of the native reds - by eating them. This notion has been circulating for quite some time, has given butcher shops in the UK a renewed entrepreneurial spirit, and has challenged chefs who possess a desire to appear both creative and patriotic.

What a world. Imagine if we all sought, similarly, to conquer our various enemies by eating them.

Labor union leaders would publish cookbooks containing varieties of souffles one might whip up using recalcitrant CEOs and vicious vice presidents as the main ingredients.

Assembly line workers would hold morale-raising barbecues, with the sole purpose of skewering, marinating and roasting the shop foremen.

The stomach, formerly known only as an organ of sustenance for the body, would now become a sociopolitical battleground. Who could have predicted such a fate for this simple part of our anatomy?

Squirrels of Britain beware: The hand that feeds you all those nuts so lovingly and generously today may simply be seeking to fatten you up for tomorrow - for supper.

4 comments:

Henry the Dog said...

Mum says it's disgraceful. She saw a programme on TV - I think it was BBC but I'm not too sure. It was a month or so ago. These two guys caught a squirrel, put it in a sack then killed it by hitting it over the head - then they started talking about how to cook and eat it. Mum couldn't believe what she had seen. She truly thought she'd imagined it. She thought it was some kind of Monty Python sketch and that John Cleese would suddenly appear and say that it was all a joke. It wasn't, and mum was quite traumatised. She still can't believe it was aired on TV.

Cactus Jack Splash said...

Run squirrels run...
Why would you want to eat one?

Lone Grey Squirrel said...

This means War!

Poetikat said...

Ooh that blender is just nasty! Reminds me of that SNL sketch with Dan Ackroyd as Julia Child. I wonder if she's ever shished a squirrel.

As Dick, the butcher (aptly enough) said in Henry VI, "The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers."

I imagine they'd be rather tasty, what?

Kat