06 December 2008

Underwear...under WHERE?

First comes the bad news that pretty much shook up the Squirrel Economy.

There is, apparently, an acorn shortage here in the U.S., stretching from the state of Virginia to points south. Trees just didn't seem to have produced sufficiently this year for the squirrel population and news accounts are reporting how wildlife advocates have been encouraging people to supplement nuts and other food where they can. This is important. Because without nuts or acorns, of course, squirrel unemployment rises rapidly - with nothing to bury, our country is besieged by increasing numbers of out-of-work squirrels.

So while we humans have it bad on Wall Street, squirrels are taking a dive on Acorn Lane.

Then, suddenly, comes a burst of good news: Squirrels, even those that are acorn-challenged, needn't suffer nakedness any longer. Squirrel underwear - known in the United Kingdom as Y-fronts - is now available!

Let the good news be shouted from the acorn-less treetops! Perhaps the availability of a comfortable cotton garment, just as winter starts to clench its icy grip, will be of some comfort during these trying times.

Indeed, perhaps we humans, struggling with a tragically faltering global economy, might also seek comfort in nice, new comfy cotton underwear. Wouldn't it be nice if that's all it took in this world?

It would certainly provide some warmth where it counts most.


Cactus Jack Splash said...

Maybe the squirrels can approach the government and ask for an acron bail-out package.

squirrelmama said...

I suspect the government would turn squirrels down because they don't vote, Cactus Jack. However, the squirrels could always threaten to come and gnaw on the congressmen's wires.....

Henry the Dog said...

Well they'd certainly be more 'manly' than the stupid 'baby-gro' my mum's been making me wear:)

Kat Mortensen said...

That's fine, as long as it's a natural fiber like bamboo.